Tag Archives: voice

Brown Girl Dreaming Review

. Books I am glad were written, Books in verse . , , , , , , , , , , ,

Brown Girl Dreaming is the autobiographical memoir of Jacqueline Woodson’s childhood.  It has racked up an astounding four awards!!! National Book Award, Coretta Scott King Award, Newbery Honor Book, and Robert F. Sibert Informational Book Award.  Not too shabby! This review, unfortunately, does put a few smudges on all those beautiful accolades.

brown-girl-dreaming

Written in verse, we travel with Jackie from her early childhood in Columbus, Ohio, to live with her grandparents in the Nicholtown neighborhood in Greenville, South Carolina, to her final home in Brooklyn, New York.  Young Jacqueline is keenly aware that she is unlike others in her family and searches for the thing that fits her just right.

What children will like about it:

This is a story that young girls will be drawn to.  They will identify with Jackie as she struggles with knowing her place in her family and overcoming the challenges she faced with reading.  Though the book is thick, there is a lot of white space on the pages making it friendly to reluctant readers. Jackie also faces very difficult events in her life that children will either relate to from their own histories, or draw closer to Jackie as they sympathize with her. The historical backdrop is a character in itself.  While set against intense civil right battles, the personal perspective was a safe distance from some of the pivotal events, but the reader sits on edge knowing that something could happen.  The young reader will feel anger, sadness, satisfaction, worry, pride, and strength while turning these pages.

Through a writer’s eyes

The language was a cozy blanket on a rainy day.  Vivid word pictures, deep emotion, tight and succinct, only wordy on purpose and on occasion.  The house in Nicholtown felt like home to me and I melted into Grandma Georgiana’s kitchen. Daddy’s song as he sauntered home and his breath being squeezed away by emphysema, or the like, made him the most concrete character to me.  It made me want to be a child sitting on the porch with him, listening to him sing.

The story is subtle.  Jackie’s journey as she finds her way through her struggle as a reader to grow into a writer is very relatable.  However, the story took a back seat to the poetry.  Keeping in mind this is a memoir, the plot was not thick with turns and twists, but it was deeply personal.  The voice sounds like an adult remembering her youth, which is what it is, but it would be stronger if it sounded like a young girl.  This is tricky when writing in verse.  Poetry is inherently more mature, to turn the voice youthful is challenging.

Nonetheless, I was mesmerized by this story and glad it was one that was written.  I will leave you with one of my favorite parts of the book, it comes from the poem “The Ghosts of the Nelsonville House.”

Look closely. There I am

in the furrow of Jack’s brow,

in the slyness of Alicia’s smile,

in the bend of Grace’s hand . . .

There I am . . .

Beginning

Visit Ms. Woodson here to learn more about her.

Questions to Critique By

. Writer's Craft . , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I am handing out a story that I have revised once to my critique group.  Whenever I give them a full manuscript to read I like to attach a suggestion sheet of questions they can ponder while critiquing.  We are a pretty green group and I want to get constructive feedback, not just a pat on the back.  I limit the questions to two to three per category.

These questions are also helpful for when I am self-editing.  I would like to say these are all original questions, but I once heard someone say, ideas are original when you can’t remember where you first heard it.  Many of these questions have been taken from a checklist I found on line here, but I narrowed it down and added some of my own.  So from my bag of tricks, I give you Questions to Critique By.

(FYI – I start by giving my critique group an idea of what I feel is pertinent information about the story like intended audience and what I am trying to achieve in plot and character development.)

Characters:

  • Are their voices consistent with their characters? Do you see places where their voice slip or where it can be amplified?
  • Are the characters rich and developed or flat and stereotypic?
  • Are there too many characters or too much time spent on secondary characters that detracts from the main plot of the story and the focus on the protagonist?

Voice

  • Does the writing style seem fresh, original?
  • Does the mood of the characters influence how they see their world?
  • Does the overall tone and style of the writing work well for the story?

Pacing

  • How does the pacing of the story feel? Does the book drag in spots due to excessive narration or from uninteresting scenes?
  • In faster action scenes, does the pace speed up with shorter sentences and paragraphs?
  • Are the scenes moving at a good clip or do they need some trimming?

Conflict

  • Is there an overarching conflict present in the story that is key to the premise and grows to a climax and resolution?
  • Do the protagonists face one conflict or obstacle after another (each worse than the previous) that force them to have to make tough decisions?

Plot

  • Does the overall plot come across clearly in the novel?
  • Are there scenes in the book that do not serve the plot and don’t seem to have a point?
  • Is the plot interesting and engaging?

Tension

  • Is tension created at the outset of the book?
  • Are the protagonists compelling enough to heighten tension by the reading caring about them?

Fantasy

  • These are creatures developed in my mind, do you have a clear understanding of what they are, what they do, what they look like?   (Keep in mind, I expect this will be an illustrated book, so I am leaving some room for the illustrator to help create my character’s appearance.)
  • What questions would you want answered in this book about these creatures that have not been addressed?

Show and Tell

  • Consider the sensory detail. What parts overload the senses? What parts could use more sensory detail?
  • Is the language vivid?
  • Were there scenes where your mental movie projector had problems seeing the scenes? If so, which ones

Humor

  • Did you have laugh out loud moments? If so, where?
  • Are there segments where the humor could be pushed? Or dialed back?
  • It was intended to be funny (at least some parts). Did it happen?

That’s it.

What questions would you add to the list?

 

Top Ten Pearls from the Prairie

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My brain is full and my head is spinning. I had been hitting it against a wall feeling like I had taken my MS as far as I could, knowing that it could still be better but not having an inkling how to do it. NOT ANY MORE!

pearls

About a week ago I attended the annual Prairie Writer’s and Illustrator’s Day hosted by the Illinois network of SCBWI. This was my third time participating and well worth the repeat attendance.  I’ve taken this week to process, marinate, and sort through the keynote address, three break out sessions, two expert panels, and a dozen conversations.

Of course they have rules about blogging, so I won’t go into tremendous details, but I will share some pearls that I am adding to my treasure box.  With that in mind, here are my

Top Ten Pearls from the Prairie

10.  It pays to push yourself out of your happy little shell and meet new people.  As a result I met some wonderful fellow writers, some of whom offered to read for me.

9.  Editors and agents are approachable!  Pull up those big girl pants and talk to them!  When else will you have an opportunity like this?  SO I did.  I talked to three editors and one agent and got answers to specific questions that I had about writing in general and my story in particular.  This will also give me personal sentiments to include in that darn query I will have to write to submit to them.

8. An online course you should know about: Rachel Orr, an agent at Prospect Agency, is teaching a course on middle grade novel writing that starts in January on mediabistro.com.

7. Keynote speaker, Author and Illustrator, Eliza Wheeler – (she also makes a soundtrack for her WIP, love it when I hear someone share something that I do too!) – Focus on what you like about your story, not what you don’t. It’s so easy to be critical isn’t it? But that kind of energy can drain the life and enjoyment out of a project.

I have found that when I watch my two and a half minute book trailer before working on my revision I get pumped up.  The trailer encapsulates the essence that I want my book to have.  After watching it I am in the right mindset and mood to attack my WIP.  Same is true for reading passages or chapters that work.  My confidence lifts.  I can write and I can even write well.

6. Jordan Brown, Senior Editor Walden Pond Press & Balzer + Bray, said the ultimate rule of writing is . . . drum roll . . .

You can do whatever you want as long as it works!

Do you feel liberated now?

5. Noa Wheeler, editor Henry Holt Books for Young Readers gave me the assurance that editors are on your side.  They love books and the people who write them.  Why be intimidated?  A common theme I heard throughout the day was about relationship and collaboration between writers and editors.

4.  During the mix-n-mingle session I asked Rachel Orr about platform building and the usefulness of having a book trailer for a pre-published book.  The gist of her answer, focus on writing well.  Gotcha!

3. Attended a break out session on voice by Brett Duquette, editor at Sterling Children’s Books.  Up until this point, voice has been a very abstract thing for me.  It’s becoming more clear now.  I am attacking my MS with highlighters.  Does each character sound consistent throughout?  How about my narrator?  Who is my narrator?  Does my characters’ mood influence how they see their world?  This session was filled to the brim with applicable bits of knowledge, delivered with incredible humor.  Best break out of the day award!

2.  Got a critique on my first pages from Caroline Abbey, senior editor at Penguin Random House!  It was NOT a last minute thing where she wrote a few thoughts on the airplane ride here.  It WAS on letter head!  But more importantly her fresh eyes on my stale words gave me new perspective on these opening pages.  As helpful as it was to know the areas that I can improve, it was equally beneficial to know which parts are working.  There’s nothing like seeing “Nice!” next to a sentence!  Whoop! Whoop! I don’t have to only read others’ work to see good writing.  I have it in my work too.  Now I have to work at making all words, sentences, paragraphs, scenes, and chapters equally strong.

1.  I followed up with Caroline Abbey about some questions I had from her critique.  (I wrote them down before I talked to her because I knew I’d forget! And I did, I was so glad I wrote them down!)  I asked her about strategies for thinking of a title,  how to pinpoint a tell,  and questions to ask myself to figure out how to tighten my work.

She related to how I dreaded the thought of coming up a new title.  I’ve been reading scripture and 19th century poetry about fire, playing in the thesaurus, and checking my ideas on Goodreads.  Brainstorming with writing friends and my husband.  This really is torture! I’ve been trying to zoom in on sentences that are vague or generic.  Is it a tell?  Do I need to show it or scrap it?

This week I’ve reduced by first 5 chapters by 10% and modified a whole bunch of sentences and scenes that weren’t pulling their weight.  Not a bad start.  So much more to do!

Bud, Not Buddy

. Books I am glad were written . , , , , , ,

Bud, not buddyPublished in 1999, a winner of both a Newberry Medal and the Coretta Scott King Award.   I can see why!  This story is like a favorite song.  Where the melody is catchy, the lyrics are moving, the background instruments get highlighted in all the right places, and it’s easy on the ears.  Masterfully it comes together and appears seamless and effortless.

Another historical fiction novel that belies the difficulty of the craft, but gives me inspiration to keep at it nonetheless.  This will be one I reread to study how Christopher Paul Curtis did many things, but most significantly voice and characterization.   I also need to reread it because I enjoyed it so much that I zipped through it and forgot to pay attention to how the story was crafted.

It is written in the first person, which is a challenge I am not up for.   Clearly Mr. Curtis loved Bud, and most likely identified with his main character.

As a teacher, I told the students it helped to make a mental movie of the story to help with visualization and comprehension. This story made it so easy to do that.  The details did not beat you over the head, but was just enough so that I could take what the author gave me and incorporate it with my experiences and paint a great picture.

Bud was not a character in a story but a boy so much like many of the boys I have taught.  He had a funny sense of humor, a couple eccentricities that made him who he was, and very deep hurts that he dealt with so quietly.  Truly well done.  And one that I am glad was written

Tackling Character’s Voice in 3 Ways

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Who am I? courtesy uskidsmags.com

Who am I?
courtesy uskidsmags.com

Which is easier: creating life or performing total reconstructive surgery where no vital organ or system is left untouched?

The nice thing about writing the rough draft was the liberty to write garbage just to move the story forward and find the end.  Now it’s time for surgery.  We’ll be hanging out in Revision Step Three: First Rewrite for a little bit.

During my reread, one of the things that stood out to me was the feeling that the main characters did not have a strong enough voice that easily identified them.  I don’t want my reader to rely on dialogue tags to know who is speaking.  The three characters I most need to focus on are my main character, the antagonist, and my main character’s sidekick.  These guys get the most words on the page, so they better count.

There are three things I am doing to help me craft their separate voices.

1.  Write a scene that occurs outside of the story.  Stories generally start on the day when life changes for the MC.  To help learn the character’s voice I have written scenes that occurred prior to or outside of the story, when life was normal, an everyday kind of conflict, an everyday kind of event.  No high drama, just take a look at your character before their world gets turned upside down.  I wrote a scene for my sidekick eating breakfast with her family the morning of the Great Fire.  It was lovely and funny, and I hate that there is no purpose for it in the story, but it’s nice having this special scene just for me.  It made me more familiar with the sidekick by helping me see her in her natural environment.

2.  Change the point of view. My story is being written from the third person, omniscient to the MC, but not all characters.  For a while my MC was not turning out the way I wanted him to be and, honestly, I didn’t really like him.  I rewrote the opening scene in the first person and I really got inside his head.  This naturally changed other parts of the opening scene, but I think it was all for the better.  I am keeping the story in third person, but stepping out and writing “diary entries” brings me tighter to my character without so much of the author’s filter getting in the way.

My Favorite:

3. Determine your character’s personality type.  There is a lot of research that goes into writing.  One of the golden nuggets I happened upon was The Myers Briggs Test.  Four short questions later and I found out which of sixteen different personalities my MC fell into.  Then I found High Level Description of the Sixteen Personality Types.  What do I like about this?

  • It’s fun – who doesn’t like to take multiple choice personality tests?
  • It validated my perception of my MC, antagonist, and sidekick when I started reading their descriptions.
  • It gave me ideas to consider to make their personalities deeper.  None of them are the same personality type as I am.  (Of course I took it too.  How could I resist?)  Therefore, I don’t think exactly as they would.  For example, my MC is an ISTJ (Introverted Sensing with Extraverted Thinking), which the High Level people termed “The Duty Fulfiller.”  In the research I read, “The ISTJ’s word is as good as gold, and they honor their commitments faithfully.”  Well, I have a scene where my MC goes back on his word.  Even though this needs to happen for the sake of my book’s pacing, the MC has to be really conflicted about it.  AND the sidekick has to show the MC the value in the changed plan or else there is no way an ISTJ  would go for it.  A couple lines of dialogue and the text will be richer and the MC will be deeper.

OK – two bonus ideas

4. Raise the conflict.  Every conflict the character is in reveals more about him.  Keep making life harder for him and you will find out who he is.

5.  Skip the dialogue.  Once I start writing dialogue a scene can get away from me, a bit like chasing rabbits.  Write a scene (with conflict of course!) but very limited dialogue.  Stay close to the character’s thoughts, body language, reactions. You are most likely making this kid up, the more you know about him, the more you can reveal, the better the reader can identify with him.

What tricks do you use for developing your character’s voice?

I know you are going to take the personality test.  I’ll tell you mine, if you tell me yours 🙂

Next time:  Show don’t tell, using body language (I don’t know how many times my characters shrug and nod.  Somebody help me!)

Til then,

Enjoy Playing with Words!

BTW – I am attending the Wild Wild Midwest Conference with SCBWI this weekend.  Of course they have the no blogging policy, but who knows what ideas will spin from it!